When I was diagnosed with OCD last year I wasn’t seeing much of my future. I was inside a bubble of fear, sure that nothing would ever change about me and that I was destined to be miserable for the rest of my life. The stability that I was going to gain didn’t seem logical and logical thinking was something that I had never really done anyway.
My life felt as though it was going around and around and if the cycle was going to break I would to not only have to act different but think different. When your mentally ill your thoughts tend to overtake your life and cause more conflict than you intended.
I realized recently that I’m not the same as I was a few months ago. The main thing I was doing was thinking I could get better. Who knew positive thinking would work? I hear people talk about it but until you actually do it it’s all talk.
I’ll admit that I’m not perfect and I still have some tendencies to wash my hands. I also don’t let anyone use my bathroom, but that one I believe is more of a preference. People can have disgusting bathroom habits and if you have been to a public restroom you know exactly what I’m talking about.
But all things in life take time. If this is what I’ve accomplished in a year, I would love to see myself next year. I am happy to have freedom from my illness and to start to enjoy life as God intended. Filled with joy!